today was an ex's birthday. and while i toyed with the idea of mailpooping her, i remembered that new leaf i turned over (you know, the one where i try to be less of an emo a-hole). so i just called and said happy birthday instead. which she thought was "sweet."
someday though i really hope somebody scorns me enough that i'm moved to send them shrink-wrapped dogshit in an innocent looking, anonymous package. what a goddamn brilliant idea. i hope those people are making a lot of money. because i mean, it's totally affordable.
also, when i get around to recording 'no hard feelings' properly, i'm going to send it to them and see if they want to use it as their theme song. i'm not sure i could ever reach levels of stardom higher than that.
move over led zeppelin.
shit. i made myself the strongest (by accident) black russian just now. guess the only thing to do is drink it and watch high fidelity. of course, if i had any milk in this apartment, it would be a white russian and the big lebowski.