they say it's your birthday

today was an ex's birthday. and while i toyed with the idea of mailpooping her, i remembered that new leaf i turned over (you know, the one where i try to be less of an emo a-hole). so i just called and said happy birthday instead. which she thought was "sweet."

someday though i really hope somebody scorns me enough that i'm moved to send them shrink-wrapped dogshit in an innocent looking, anonymous package. what a goddamn brilliant idea. i hope those people are making a lot of money. because i mean, it's totally affordable.

also, when i get around to recording 'no hard feelings' properly, i'm going to send it to them and see if they want to use it as their theme song. i'm not sure i could ever reach levels of stardom higher than that.

move over led zeppelin.

shit. i made myself the strongest (by accident) black russian just now. guess the only thing to do is drink it and watch high fidelity. of course, if i had any milk in this apartment, it would be a white russian and the big lebowski.

providence

i went up to providence this weekend to see some old friends and to see monty's fan club (or i guess it's just monty now) play their cd release show. those guys are so f-ing good. they had the cranston youth chamber choir on stage with them for a song. unfortunately, the sound was kinda dismal, but a lot of kids came out, and people all seemed to have a good time regardless. i also got to see the lingo play, which is another great band from providence, and some of the guys from zox were in the audience and they rule too. none of these bands have heard of watched pots.

i also spent some time noodling around with guitars and reverb and vocal delays with my friend chris, who is a bit of a mad-scientist genius when it comes to producing cool sounds. it was my first time in a while messing around (musically) with someone else and i think it did me a world of good. driving back to new york i thought of what "a viking's funeral" is missing, and now i just need to find a way to make it happen (too bad it's not just a kazoo part).

and, i got some ny system hot weiners (this is a providence exclusive). if you ever get out to providence, make sure to find a place that sells these and eat a bunch of them. i'd been craving them for months, and two days after having them, i already crave again.

so yeah, good weekend. quite good.

ohmygod i almost forgot to tell you. there was a centipede in my shower today when i got back to queens. a big one. rock.

endless mike and the beagle club

there's a band i've been listening to for a while now that is so good, i can't even take it. the songwriting is so far superior to just about everything else that it's really inspired me to try to be even half as good. so you should check them out. they're called endless mike and the beagle club, from johnstown, pa*. their official site is here, and you can hear some of their music here and here.

when you're done wowing at that, i have a few favors to ask of you. ok just one. join the mailing list. i swear, i send out maybe one thing a month (in may there were zero) but it would mean the world to me just to know you care.

actually i thought of a couple more favors. comment on this blog once in a while so i know you read it. you can do it anonymously if you're shy, i'm down with that. just don't call me an a-hole. and if you do the myspace thing, let's be friends. you'll find the link for watched pots at myspace up to the right.

*springsteen sings about johnstown in 'the river' so you know it's a cool fucking town.

and that frankly will not fly

it's really hard being a guy who likes to write songs and record songs, but not being a guy who can play lots of instruments or has a band. i attribute the fact that there've been no new songs posted to my frustration with my lack of ability to play the following instruments: the piano, the drums.

i recorded "a viking's funeral" the other day on acoustic guitar, and just wasn't happy with how it came out. it needs piano. i am stymied. now, eventually, i can usually find a creative way around my inabilities, but this time i'd really like to just have some skillful piano playing, instead of some crazy shit i come up with on a radio shack keyboard through some effects pedals.

in other news, i had an eventful weekend. i partied at the waldorf-astoria, hurt my back, saw some old faces (accompanied by new faces, emo), and saw batman beat up some ninjas. also, i recieved a mix cd this weekend, which marks the first time in years that somebody's taken time out of their day to put together songs for me...and it was right on. which is nice.

trashbag

all play and no sleep make mikey a tired boy. it's only wednesday night and already i've woken up still drunk twice this week. t-r-a-s-h-b-a-g. but, i guess i wouldn't be telling you about it if i wasn't a little proud on some level. maybe i feel like if i continue to be this self-destructive, it'll make me write good songs. or piss blood.

the bottom line, though: i'm a lucky guy to have the kind of friends that i do, because without them none of this kind of week-beginning tomfoolery would be possible.

thanks, dudes and dudettes. you know who you are.

oh yeah, and i almost forgot. (this is totally lame). i made my first (and probably last) entry at urbandictionary.com. and for some reason, i'm really excited about it. check it out yo.

join the mailing list at the right or i will drown in a sea of my own tears.

who's the big winner?

so yeah. i just got back from las vegas. i went there with my ex-girlfriend (!). it's a long story, but i'll sum it up for you: she got me a trip to vegas (in june) for christmas. then we broke up at the beginning of may. then she begged me to still go to vegas with her as a "last hurrah." then i agreed because i misunderstood what that meant.

here are things that happened there (these may someday become song lyrics and when i'm touring stadiums you can impress your friends with this rad trivia. what? that'll never happen? fuck you.):

1. i lost a buttload of money. and when i say buttload, i mean buttload.
2. she started sneaking phone calls to her new dudefriend before we even got on the plane. emo.
3. the stewardess and i had the following conversation on the plane:

"is she your fiance?"
"hah. no. not really"
"why not?! she is beautiful. don't let her slip away."


"i'll have a coke. thanks."


4. i gave her a really hot backrub for like 45 mins. i got no backrub in return. no sex either. although to be fair, i didn't ask for a backrub. completely platonic.
   
5. i lost a buttload of money. BUTTLOAD.
6. we saw some crazy cirque du soleil stuff. pretty awesome.
   
7. the fountains at the bellagio dance to celine dion's "my heart will go on." wtf.
   

all in all, vegas is a rad city. my ex isn't such a bad chick even though breaking up was totally the right move for both of us(god what is happening to me?). i gambled and lost a large sum of money which i'll never see again. and now i've been to vegas. so i've got that going for me.

oh yeah, and i did record a demo of that song i promised i would, but then i misplaced the recording. when i find it, you will find it.

a viking's funeral

i have a song that's really close to done and i'm hoping to demo it this weekend. it'll be called "a viking's funeral" and it'll blow your friggin' mind.

when i say i hope to demo it, i mean i hope to play acoustic guitar and sing it and let you imagine what it might sound like fully produced someday.

so yeah...i figured if i posted this today, i might feel compelled to hold myself to it and sit down and record it this weekend. we'll see how that ends up going. wish me luck...

oh yeah. and sign up for the mailing list. and tell your friends to. and your moms.