maybe we could cut someplace of our own with these drums and these guitars

i was just going through old emails in search of something, and found something else entirely different and all but forgotten. i am moved to blog*.

this is why you save love letters long after love's departure, why your closets are full of dusty shoeboxes of photographs and keepsakes. and, i guess, in this day and age, why way back in the deepest, darkest corners of your hard drive lurk the clusters of 0's and 1's that you've done your best to disremember.

there's a reason you don't just throw them away like magazines you've read and know you'll never return to. you keep these things because you know someday you might stumble across them again. and you crave that impact. like the best punch in the stomach you've ever had. but it only works if you've really forgotten.

i had written when i was feeling especially morbid (although i remember thinking i was being poetic at the time) that life doesn't amount to much more than what people will remember about you. something about kind words at a funeral, and what an injustice it is that we don't get to attend our own. i don't remember what i wrote exactly (though from what i can remember i'm not impressed with my originality), because i didn't find what i wrote...it's long gone and it doesn't matter anyway. i found the response, from a friend with whom i've since lost touch.

today's gut-punch is brought to you by the forgotten insights of an old friend who always saw right through you and still liked you anyway.

* to use the word 'blog' as a verb is reprehensible and i am deeply sorry.

mama's got a squeeze box

i forgot to mention the most important part (least important). i bought a children's accordion at this place called pearl river in nyc which is basically a place where you can buy all kinds of random shit (made in china) for super cheap. it works more like a harmonica than a real accordion because pulling and sqeezing the same key make a different note, but i'm gonna learn to play it and write a song featuring it.

and that is a promise.

which i will break.

do you think your security can keep you in purity? you will not shake us off, above or below. scottish friction. scottish fiction.

so i had this whole emo plan today to write an open letter to everyone who ever done me wrong (or done me right) all at once like every sentence would be about someone different but i would write is as just one letter.

but instead i went to digitallife with my friend john to see some dorks and video games and then we drank quarts of beer from this japanese place in soho and now i feel like my head could roll off my neck and i'm sure as hell not about to air all of my business i've ever had with anybody in front of you nosey people right now.

at the convention i got a "geek squad" monitor brush which i can use to get dust off my screen instead of just using my hands like i used to. progress.

i'm gonna order a burrito for delivery from fresco tortilla. i don't know what you're gonna do.

win one for the kippur

today is another day i am off work for a jewish holiday. i went to the dmv. see, even when you have a valid driver's license from another state, you've got some hoops to jump through to get a ny license. and since my old license expired, i needed to do it.

a visit to the dmv is basically the worst thing imaginable. there are lines, but nobody in any line knows what they're in line for. or at least, they won't tell you. and everybody who works there hates you. even little old ladies who try to chip through the tough exteriors of these people can't get through and leave with their tails (or shawls) between their legs.

i just realized it's totally unoriginal to write about a dmv trip. everyone has done it. i just wanted to use the word obfuscated, because i was reminded today what a great word that is. so now i went and used it. moving on.

i've listened to idlewild's record warnings/promises a few times in the past few days and i finally get it. that band is fucking brilliant. i met them one time and was a total douchebag and just held out something for them to sign rather than try to engage them in conversation (even though there are a million things i would've loved to ask them). it is one of the few times i've been starstruck in my life. regardless, roddy woomble is one of the most gracious-even-though-he-doesn't-have-to-be rock musicians i have ever met.

omgwtfbbq

there is a bbq joint in soho (i can't even remember what it's called) that i went to last night which, based purely on food deliciousness, is the best bbq joint i have ever been to.

if you take atmosphere into account then wes' rib house in providence still gives it a run for the money. their flowering onion (absent from the menu at this place in soho, tisk tisk) is a good preview of heaven, which it also serves (along with the rest of your meal there) to bring you a little bit closer to in a temporal sense.

so anyway. while we were there my friends and i were a bit...boisterous. and as we got up to leave the 3 or so tables that surrounded around us all got deathly silent and gave us the stink-eye.

god damn that was some cold shit.

it's raining in baltimore, baby

well, i don't know if it is or not. but it sure as hell is raining in monroe, ct. i'm here because it's my old man's birthday, and we're going to celebrate when he gets home from work. in the meantime, i've spent most of the day battling a headache and reading old issues of rolling stone, which my parents inexplicably have a subscription to.

in the august issue there's a great feature on coldplay that reminded me how much i like that band even though i think x&y kinda sucks.

i am only posting right now because i've been reading magazines for a very long time and can't bear the thought of starting another one.

i played my dad's old guitar for a little while but i can't find a pick anywhere in this house and i really wanted one so i just quit.

i took the dog for a walk but it's pouring and she didn't want to go very far because she wasn't the one who had an umbrella. so basically we turned around right after she did a huge poop in the middle of the street.

in the city rainy days are different. you can't hear it hitting the roof.

it's never going to heal if you keep picking at it

i've posted what looks to be the final version of "new york city" at all the music sites. check it out when you get a chance. i think it sounds pretty good.

i'm not sure how the whole record is going to go just yet, but i'm pretty sure the 2 new songs that are up will be the last 2 on the record, in the order they've appeared. so you can let me know if you think that's dumb.

and i guess you can't see the image of my horrid moustache on myspace unless you join, so if you don't want to do what all the cool kids are already doing, you can check it out without joining anything at pulverradio, all you gotta do is put your mouse over the thumbnail on the bottom right. that picture isn't going to stay there long because the more i look at it the more i get creeped out by myself.

i put myself at the mercy of the court

ok i put the picture of my shady moustache up at myspace. for the benefit of everyone (read: david and only david) who expressed an interest. mostly i put it up because i'm a glutton for punishment and i welcome your comments. my mom said i looked like "a chicano high school kid trying to look tough." see if you can top that.

let the record show that the moustache lived for approximately 15 minutes before i lost my nerve.

also there are now 3 songs completely done for the record. i am on a roll.

also i am a dirtbag.

also i wish i kept the moustache.

this is one difference between guys and girls

this weekend i shaved but i left the moustache. then i took a picture of it with my lame camera phone and sent it out to a trusted ally to see what he thought. he liked it, but i didn't have the balls, so i cut it anyway. but i saved the picture. it's dirtbag-rageous.

100% of the females i've shown it to think it looks disgusting.

100% of the dudes who've seen it think it rocks.

i myself am kinda obsessed with the idea of a really ratty moustache and promise to do it at some point. but probably not anytime soon.

maybe i'll put the picture up somewhere where you can see it. you know, if you want me to.

lest we forget why we're here

the record is coming along surprisingly well. only two songs remain completely unrecorded, and all the rest are in various stages of completion on the mixing/editing end. i listened very loudly to what i've got so far in the car today and i have to say i'm really happy with it. for whatever that's worth.

i have a couple days off of work this week because of the jews. i plan to be entirely unproductive, and try to recharge my batteries a little bit.